Sunday 8 July 2012

Tips On How To Overcome Social Anxiety


What is Social Anxiety Disorder (Social Phobia)?
Do you, break-out in cold sweat, tremble, have palpitations, get up-set stomach, nauseate, hyperventilate, find it difficult to think, get cold and sweaty hands … all at the thought of interacting with people or being in situations where you are likely to be under other people’s attention?  Do you have an intense fear that you will do or say something silly that will earn you the scorn and ridicule of others?


If your answer is yes to any one or a combination of the above then you should investigate whether or not you have the condition known as Social Anxiety Disorder or social phobia.  The fear we are talking about here is not the mild nervousness that someone gets when meeting someone new, like a girl or guy that you have some fancy for; or even the kind of nervousness that accompanies giving a presentation or going for an interview.  What we are talking about is a deep-seated, intense and irrational fear of interacting with people in normal social settings. 



Prevalence



Social anxiety disorder, or social phobia, ranks as the most prevalent anxiety disorder. It is conservatively estimated to affect about 6% - 8% of the population (some estimates are higher).   In the category of mental disorders it is only topped by depression and alcoholism. 


Social anxiety disorder is diagnosed at different stages of human development, ranging from the pre-teen years and into late adulthood.   The condition is worryingly found to be most prevalent in the productive years (15 – 64 years age-group), with most cases being detected in the early 20’s.  As is the case with anxiety disorders in general, females seem more likely to be affected than males.


Social Anxiety Disorder and the Mind



A pattern of negative thinking leads to, accompanies, and magnifies one’s fears.   The same is true for social anxiety disorder.  You see yourself as not measuring up, flawed in some physical, mental or behavioral ways.  You think that others know of these flaws and are talking about them.  You feel that nobody likes you or could like you.  Blunders in the course of normal social interactions are magnified and go on to support and give credence to what you have always believed.  You assume the worst - things will go awfully wrong and you would be the one to blame; the fool.

These negative thoughts cause you to withdraw into yourself and avoid any situation that could be socially risky.  The negative tapes are replayed again and again, thus reinforcing your beliefs and as time goes by the condition worsens. After all, what the mind focuses on grows.  Behavioral and thinking patterns become entrenched. 

Dealing with Your Anxiety


When dealing with the medical condition, Social Anxiety Disorder,  it is advisable that you seek professional medical help. Speak with your medical practitioner and (s)he can advise on a possible course of treatment or refer you to other qualified professionals.



There are actions, though, that you can take to deal with your social anxiety and gain control of your social life. Here are some tips:



1. Positive thinking: Understand that negative thoughts will come into your mind. The thing is not to harbor them or try to fight them.  Simply replace the negative thoughts about the situations and circumstances that trigger your phobia with a positive one. Every time you have a negative thought that reinforce your fear, replace it with a positive statement about yourself that negates the negative thought.  For example, if you have a thought that nobody likes you, think of the people who like you – family members, friends, teachers, co-workers, church members – whoever the person(s) maybe. Affirm that you are likable. Likewise, if it’s a thought that you can’t do something, think of ways in which you could go about doing it and affirm to yourself that you can do it.



2. Positive visualizing: Use positive imagery and visualize yourself dealing successfully with the situation that triggers your anxiety.  For instance, see you interacting - talking and laughing - with co-workers or other people at a social gathering.  If it is a presentation, see you in front of your audience delivering the talk and the audience receiving it appreciatively.  Allow you self to experience the good feeling that comes with these positive visions.



3. Prepare: If you know what you are going to say or do in a given situation preparing will make you feel more comfortable and not as fearful.  So review possible conversation topics. Try to think of topics that the persons you will be interacting with like to talk about and do a little research.  Read articles on the topic so you have a good idea what it entails and can communicate on it. Remember you are not trying to be an expert, just to know enough so you can contribute to a discussion.  If you are trying to meet someone practice conversation starters and read about and watch videos on meeting people. 

  
4. Facing your fear: If you want to learn to swim, you have to get in the water. Likewise you will have to face your fears and immerse yourself in the situation that usually triggers your anxiety. Not all at once, if it can be helped, but gradually and work your way up to a full immersion. If its meeting people then, perhaps you could first start by saying hi to people, preferably in a safe setting like at church, work, and the cashier at the pharmacy or supermarket.  Just start.


5. Calm yourself:  Know that it is normal to feel a little nervous when in new social situations, like meeting people, speaking in public. Before engaging, you can reduce the level of nervousness by taking in a deep breath, holding it for 5-10 seconds and then slowly exhaling (repeat a couple of times). You could also tense all your muscles after taking the deep breath and hold your breath and the tension in your muscles for about 5 seconds then slowly release the tension as you slowly breathe out.



6. Review your progress and repeat the process: Note what you have done and the results 



Social anxiety is a stressful problem to tens of millions of people.  Millions have learned to cope and effectively deal with their anxieties. For more details and in-depth information to teach you how to deal with social anxiety click here.


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